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Behavior:
Client presented to a 60-minute office session appearing worn down. Client expressed difficulty in caring for his mother, who has dementia, stating, "She's not the same person anymore, and I don't know how to deal with it." Client described his mother's significant personality changes, including confusion, agitation, and not recognizing him on some days. Client reported feelings of grief, guilt, and exhaustion, noting that it feels like he is grieving her even though she is still alive. Client also mentioned feeling unable to take breaks from caregiving without experiencing guilt.
Intervention:
The therapist validated the client's feelings of anticipatory grief and normalized his experience of mourning the changes in his mother. Psychoeducation was provided on anticipatory grief and caregiving stress. The therapist introduced communication adjustments, such as validating his mother's emotions and avoiding attempts to correct her reality, to reduce distress. The therapist also discussed the importance of boundaries and encouraged the client to explore respite care options and seek additional support from family members.
Response:
Client appeared to engage with the discussion and expressed understanding of anticipatory grief and caregiving stress. Client seemed receptive to the communication strategies and the idea of setting boundaries. By the end of the session, client appeared less overwhelmed and expressed relief at feeling "permission" to prioritize his own well-being.
Plan:
Client will research respite care options in his area and practice one of the communication strategies discussed during the session. The next session is scheduled in two weeks at the office. The therapist will continue to support the client in managing caregiving stress and anticipatory grief while exploring additional coping strategies.
We had a 60-minute office session today. Tom came in looking really worn down and said it's been getting harder and harder to take care of his mom, who has dementia. He said quote 'She's not the same person anymore, and I don't know how to deal with it' unquote. He talked about how his mom's personality has changed so much, she used to be warm and funny, and now she's often confused, sometimes agitated, and she doesn't recognize him some days. He said it feels like he's grieving her even though she's still here, and that makes him feel guilty.
We spent some time talking about how that grief is real and valid. It's called anticipatory grief, and it's completely normal when someone you love is changing due to dementia. I reassured him that it's okay to mourn the person she used to be while also caring for the person she is now. We also talked about the stress of caregiving, he's been doing most of it on his own, and he's exhausted. He said he feels like he can't take a break without feeling guilty.
We worked on some communication adjustments that might help. I explained that trying to correct her or bring her back to reality often just causes more distress for both of them, so instead he can try validating her emotions and going along with where she is.
What else, oh yeah, we talked about boundaries and how he doesn't have to do this alone. I suggested looking into respite care or asking other family members to step up more, because he can't pour from an empty cup. His homework is to research respite care options in his area and to practice one of the communication strategies we talked about. He seemed a little less overwhelmed by the end, like he finally had permission to take care of himself too. We'll meet again in two weeks to check in.
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